Thursday, June 1, 2017

2016 Panera scripts iii

*sits down, talks incessantly, no one nods, just looks at them*

I swear I tell people at work what I'm doing 10,000 times a day. 'Are you at work today?' 'I'm at school today!'

*long silence*

Did I tell you what happened on the computer today?

*long silence*

*eats, eats, looks at phone*

Is Panera Mexican?

*looks at phone*

Oh, it says Panera means bread basket in Spanish.

*silence*

*spoon clanging against soup bowl*

So, here's this thing I got...well, I told you about it, the sleepy hollow headless horseman statue for work--ahh, I love sleepy hollow--but they were sold out, but i walked a few stores over and they had it in grey, but not black. 20% off.

*shows phone*

Do you like it in grey or is black better?

*they look at the phone, but no response*

*calls store directly*

Hi, I'm calling to see if you still have a Halloween item there...they put me on hold, sometimes when you call they half-ass it. I'm going.to lose the statue, that's what's going to happen!

*moves phone from ear*

They said, 'we don't have it anymore.' I don't trust people, I'll go look myself.

*eats*


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