Tuesday, February 21, 2017

I'm only asking for a friend:

You know when you see old-friend, long-time-no-see, talking about traveling,
you know, someone you are very comfortable with, no smalling feat, breathe,
someone you wonder about, why you have never gotten together, someone
who has has said before--making you question for a second--has said before,
drunk + high, "if only you were a guy, you'd be perfect," for a second, stomach
drop, you aren't enough, for a second, stomach ache, they have some unspoken
want, who knowing now, all-new-rarely-before-maybe-first-time-in-five-years
you too have a want, some stuff, some not-quite-desire, but interest, probably
dead & vapid, some superficial gone-when-gotten thing, how it goes in fantasy,
but, yes, now knowing so-called-crush, they say withs defeat, "I hope you get
everything you ever wanted,"  and if you were to think about it too long you
would be stuck--the worst--stuck, you'd just (over-drama) die, because you'd
give them anything they could possible ask for (fucking anything), despite how
you feel: it would ruin what is here, repeat: it would ruin what is already here?

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