someday I will be rich or famous enough to pay someone. love me

It's all about finding out what works for you: like getting really sick and sad and scared and knowing that you have no one in close proximity that you can be emotionally vulnerable with (and knowing how pathetic that is because you have been in said city for over 2 years and emo-unavail is sort of your m.o. and you always thought "die alone" was the best future in MASH anyways) and making really bad videos, which are passable as art. Or, like, getting super drunk and filling out job and residency applications.