Some here, the persons we make happiness

Some comes a time in Person's life when they have to *46h no-sleep, 30h only a-piece-of-cake* (catch irony, unfortunate one) forage the terminal for nuts. Speak no language well. And slow cry in an empty corner watching ice.

It's 7am.de someHere, and Person'll still say something embarrassing like, "At least I'm cooler than Tom Hanks." ×anything for a stranger's smile, if you can't make your own×

I'm way in it, no-sleep-somber, down deep.
2 emotions: unhealthy-glee, without-sleep.

We bleed into work. They are technologic carcinogens: generating a world of...

They cannot lift and carry like I cannot lift and carry when I was younger.
We are breaking down together.

Caring. making. do.

learning to admit
learning to admit 

a breath away,     learning to admit  

pain travels across bodies
an unbearable share pain, 

admit it: kinship is always about
uneven distribution of labor —
and queers always get shafted.

Reflection comes late at night or early
both distraction and relief, exhaustion.

I am in Frankfurt airport terminal 1, I need to be in 2, and thinking of you, and how *i like to be easy* cause you keep it sad and safe

I'm dating myself to think of you. Systems and analysis. Fake shit, of course. The work is less the work, someone talked them, all of them--not on my watch--to make any cheap thing, cheap without intent of its own. To make any cheap thing and write about its referent but not transform anything. Make anything you want, a pencil, or whatever, something more tragic, probably (but I should tell you the story of accidentally tattooing my baby brother) Make a tragic thing, a facsimile of a "real" thing (oh, yeah, point out that it isn't real)...use the simplest tools possible for you, make a thing, and then simply write a 5th grade research essay that ponders nothing new, analysis, nonexistent. Just write out some facts about a thing that your thing is well a fake version of *thinking of you* and then quickly, sloppily align it to your object. Make no declarative. Keep it safe.

4th industrial revo, post id we

in woods w great digital overlords
having a body to sit in
to situate with information
data, a bit generic rn

a write up on your prothesis

individual through a mean
erotic syntax, soon disappear
sexualization of everything, the
institution follows. decentered

cut&paste, question paid to play

code as material, as cut
as  generation
as from specifics
into the broad and
from source
into murk

When I say text belongs to everyone, I hope you know I mean the world, I mean this world too, written always in codes, always inscribed with varying degrees of literacy, attached to manipulation of it, to create...we create with words all the time, and

Honestly, I'm such a joke,
and everyone knows it,
thinks they know it, but
the trick to getting them to
doubt themselves is to
pretend like you don't know,
you know, that you are a joke.

*so, then, they just think...I have no shame*

Started a joke, that
started the whole
World (is) crying

Text, you belong to the world--in create myth

we don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own youwe don't own you

the loser has to fall, why should I complain?

it's 4am, so
any song
                the word '*'belong'*'
kill we. kill we, tracy chapman

out of sight, out of mind--not always, but out of first-hand sight, out of feeling of closeness related to physical proximity--makes me mutate your flat image into a villian who is ruining my fucking life, so

i have to watch ppls horoscope to remember they are humans and as vulnerable and strong and complicated with simple needs to be able to forgive and root for their success and life-happiness

Of all the things I never wanted, you were the only one

Hungry step children in outer space

astute and unclear we drive you home at night

we switch play.
written without tradition charging the quarter moon
have babies. put bleach in the water. don't get sick.
don't be evil. house of global expansion, bureaucracy.

enter.world philosophy

inter.
a hands on model to stop
looking into magical, and
human and natural, 7 different
climates.
small scale technologies change
through creation of new tools, too
conscious transformation drives an
imagination
without politic.

we are an affinity you can't admit to

Let’s start with the idea that technology is always a force for good. This body is technology.

Strain of pervasive thought, where does it come from? Origin skills.
Poet. DJ. Sometimes models.
1960s communalism.
A brief primer
counterculture:

there were actually two
"All other doors open for you cis white male. But try enter this one and you will fail!"

It was very much focused on institutions,
and not really afraid of hierarchy.

ayahuasca ceremonies

its own to follow. I scroll through socials
I find all sorts of stories, articles

Mercury in retrograde — which is not to say
that these are the same                                  full appeal, similar
satisfy my similar urges, because they are everywhere

everything is going to be completely wrong
and messed up and miscommunicated—Mercury has left retrograde

harrowing malware market

her pale blue skin
crinkle-cut hair                                               clad in black and blood
teetering platforms, many

witch house revival, of all places, Wolfgang Tillmans

just want to say, I know I wasn't *~*soft*~* enough for them, but also

fuck that,
and, i wanted
them to dom.

flash, no safe mode, some screen ai

writes horror, to be sure
when deep, new magical counter culture
enlists the aid of MIT-IBM Watson

target algorithms, watch artificial
Earth, the failure project
don;t be evil

atoms assemble, enables quantum
what is a nerd? exploring LARPing
computing experiment, lies to players
sleek, unchanging, ever-changing

that feeling when you get super emo about something inconsequential and you start to think, "maybe they were right, maybe I am bipolar"

and, the fact that you call it
inconsequential is precisely why
they don't want you, it is precisely
why..."maybe they were right, maybe I am a sociopath."

can't help but, full vice and broadly, friend an ex

i want to make an analogy

about, maybe, not letting go of information that will harm
about, maybe, keeping it in, no matter how hot-fucking-shit-steamy the gossip

because, we take a lot of hits, we know we *look* impervious,
because, it is easier to see the sub-dom, to believe the ego too

but, i want to make an analogy, i take a lot of hits,
but, maybe sometimes, friend, just push me out of it

and, i'll feel later, for sure, hit the ground at a buffer rate,
and, that won't be fun either, side damage, avoid the face

zodiac realness (is a losing game)

""""""You are either helpful or disruptive. Your striving motivates others. Then you become an instrument for change. You want something new to happen so you initiate change or you are bored and cause trouble."""""""""
"
""
"""
""
"

what a convenient move

safe too,
but,
you know,
"no judgment"

I'm going to steal them from them, because I'm a hateful b

and,
dear diary,
I don't even mess with dick,
but I guess there is a first time
for everything. vendettas, even.


okay, okay, who are we kidding?
it'd be a shitty (women hating) teen movie, though

and it is about time to get a hint, like, if they continually do not invite you to shit...

just never thought we'd be on this side of things,
and,
dear diary,
I'm so glad I'm running away oversees for half a year.

we are a transparent child in an afterschool special

and, we wish our horoscopes would tell us the blunt truth,
"they fucking pity you, so if it hurts less, make them hate you."

when will ppl find out that my art practice basically revolves around past facebook posts?

genuinely torn between making something beautiful and simple
and making something that looks dumb, but is all-esoteric smart
and making something that is a big visual nothing, but Does all the stuff

strongly worded emails in my drafts folder

I love you for it.

We hit, we take, a confirmation of states

I'm primed for it.
*hidden camera*

Big and meaningful,
to be a long-term double.

I have replaced you all.

I'm a modest, and their popsicle melts,
With our clothes on, they enter themself.

"You may not be physically compatible...they may be more attractive than you."

*fuck you, tarot, you don't know me!*

when we think, really think about it, Nike is probably right, "Just [fucking] do it."

Am so scared of life. Am always so scared of everything. Just make self do the things that are Δnext logical moveΔ, even though scared. Even though, most likely a process of embarrassment and rejection. So unsafe. The psyche and body in the space. Even though restriction is biggest fear.

Wrapping. Wrapping around. The physical doesn't separate. *give we autonomy* Just make self do Δnext socially proscribed, logical moveΔ. Do the unacceptable, irrational, and dangerous things too. 

Because what is logic, even? Who said danger? To constrict. What is possible in the unanalyzed, and how do you figure that underdeveloped thing? Without (being some unfortunate-middle-schooler-at-space-camp) experiencing it? Because comfort isn't productive, and probably illusory, Forget it well.

I'm known for my directness. We are cryptocurrency.

terrified of the havoc, certain wreckage, of badly given advice

either way a hand between.

2017 versus
  2018, Pittsburgh Int Airport Ed: lower body pat down v upper bod action. "What is this, a sports bra?"

Well, was totally like Libras get the eff out of my readings, but then I found out it's in my chart, and I am the one I've been waiting for all my life, err all month

"Aries, you need to watch your subconscious psychic, because you are conjuring some shit. And, we can feel it. So, when you don't show up in reality, it's frustrating. I see that you're trying to build a better--you like this head, brain; you like that body. You refuse to be emotionally available. As an air sign, let me say, 'back off, Aries!' Stop being so...(they wanted to call us sl0tty) in Aquarius season, you are interested in multiple people. You are one of the most attractive signs. People are drawn to you. You think it is play-time, not everyone thinks it's funny! In Libra and Scorpio season, you are going to settle down with someone very smart, an air sign, but they have a very sharp tongue (read: they will be mean to you and you deserve it). Play-time is over. It's called: moderation (w/e)." ...and then she brought up a funeral, kmn. 
 *obsessed w storytellers*

Shack in the South, 10k, artist *only*, gallery (ha), v sex, have to sell car, alone

Just made the realest MASH for 2018-19.
Removed kids section and replaced w types of sex, including "cry-mastubate".
Other options include: -5k income, "transient lifestyle", "Amex martyr" and "forced to sell car".

*can't wait to see how it turns out!*
+see above+

already wrong, yet some plans crumble. 
so over. 

we awful, you (should be) insecure

ability to synthesize conversations into a statement
group project (which is true, equality of voice sought),
but felt (my v specific tinge of) familiar guilt--which
is that that was easy because they have many convos,
I practice those dark things, a means of pointed exaggeration

(and, am in the company of v smart ppl aware of this, but all-personal not always the case). 

So, blanket statement, for future interactions--we difficult, 
I know: we brainwash. We say something with conviction; 
you listen and nod your head, maybe. We say it again, online, 
offline, a few weeks later; the sentiment feels familiar, you 
listen more receptively because it seems to be shared by more. 
We bring it up again; you finish the sentence, you think it is yours. 

*it sounds upsetting, it is manipulative, it is example & study & research--
a way to mold the world...transform through language--trust that I do this. 
trust I am not the only one. trust that I will always be a bit fucked up, but 
I'll tell you what I am doing to your face, time to be an active listener.

dear diary,

The best thing about randomly getting to hang out w my mum is that she literally knows everything about me and my history--something we keep close to my vest, well, because ppl are not entitled to others experiences in order to respect their subjectivity and in order to treat them with care.

Bullets. But, mum knows everything, including that I hope so hard for my friend's success and happiness that I'll give them advantages for something I want as well, that I can take it, the loss. And when I'm having profession-anxiety, she brings up grade school. 

Personality pains. "Remember that time you really wanted to be crossing guard and when they offered it to you, you told them to give it to Priti instead. I felt so bad for you." 

*and, we hate how 'sweet' this sounds, 
not at all, 
it's guilt of extra knowledge 
(always with the share)...and, 
it's a totally self-defeating, gross 
martyrdom, indoctrination thing 
that should not be venerated*

Phone is gate to digital heaven + social hell.

We are w/someone.
*momentarily distracted by IG*
W/someone is telling story of annoying, but innocuous person.
*post leads to curiosity leads to googling and beautifully executed work leads to self-hate and profession-shame and feelings of inadequacy*
W/someone finishes story, yell (yell), "Honestly, what the fucking fuck is wrong with some people! So invasive and entitled to your experience."

W/someone, "Okay. I don't know if it warranted that strong of a response."


Define
irony.

made out with desperation tonight, you are welcome

Hold my fucking hand. 
We do everything alone.

made for the ice cream bg on fb

New unidentified branding scheme: cheaper than your data plan, prettier than your Big Brother. *eat we*

This popsicle meltdown is contrived to invite contradiction and relief

Sometimes I just want to make an Escape Room of my biggest fans and my biggest detractors (I know you are like, "who could not like Kevin?"...I know half of you...a third(?) of you are like, "who could possible ever, in a thousand years (or whatever the saying is) not appreciate Kevin's smart ass, yet innocent mischief? Kevin is so smart and funny and humble, what kind of Seitan-hating...?")...I want to make an Escape Room filled half and half with my biggest fans (who think far too much of me) and my detractors (who probably secretly love me, but treat me like a garbage person and apparently have no problem calling me 'trash' as if that weren't a terrible reflection of their inner-hidden-self, as if it didn't betray their polite facade, their self-righteous and humble-bragging nature...and, whom thinks they are smarter and more talented than I am, but, like, actually, I am not at all convinced and am like, "Sorry, I'm so intelligent, but also hilarious. Sorry I speak my mind with reckless abandon (seriously though). Sorry I expect a lot from other humans and find considered critique an act of respect. Sorry I don't actually villianize people, but rather expect a system to create a safer environment...cute that you thought I was that petty though. Cute that you took words (full post-irony) at face value over actions. Cool that I already knew that Could happen, but totally thought you were more More than that. And, yeah, we are cool. Am always cool. Can't you tell?!?! ^^^^) *am not drinking at all, just a fever dream, go back to sleep* So, wait, oh, right, I want to fill a room with lovers and haters, so that, through conversation, they could each have a more measured view of this whole thing, this organism-configuration-thing. What I'm trying to say, dreamlovers, is that I wish I could see myself through your eyes.

translations of lines of poetry, infographics

ice me, animations
your cancelled from their life
*obvi*

degrees of knowledge, what's smart, miley?
hand, tool, *mystery*

*i wanted to make animated backgrounds but they beat me with generative work*

unwillingness to have the body function on own--both--hybridized

i will write you a great love story
i will edit it subpar
i will continue

with my own vivisection, 4eva


*hearts*

generations work like that

they asked, "do you mess with cis straight men?
because no one I know does." and they
knew the answer, and they were
so on point. and Y is a thing I know wel
                                                                l

proposal for a talk, certainly without regard for any clarity

process oriented work
that translates across
that expands on body

both, mutually impotent
make without view, information corrects
but, hardware makes incomplete, first fault

inability to human''faculties, use prosthetics
a knowledge and a knowledge, color theory

how that relates to the formulaic and generative

We always say Speak. First + Last.

We know it is stating the obvious...we know we always do, but repetition is interesting, say it enough...but, the lens of self--full applaudable control (issues here too)--the selfie doesn't allow you to see yourself from someone else's POV...which is major, beautiful give no fucks agency--agent badassery. But, walking contradiction, critique of self-care much(?), at what point does it just reify one view (your own) and exclude all others?

real body trying to mimic superlative bodies

give we all the prosthetics

code is natural

interprets social configurations, and
the interactivity of alienation

a genuine aspect of the screen, call sequence

birth exists in rhetorical pasts. as death is a future we hold in clouded tomes.
seems easy to bleed.  to point to something more in threes.

End User

Do it.
Do it.

We are what we are.